Bisexual: Understanding Attraction to Multiple Genders

Bisexuality is a valid and widely experienced sexual orientation that refers to romantic and/or sexual attraction to more than one gender. Often misunderstood or erased—both outside and within the LGBTQ+ community—bisexual individuals frequently face unique challenges related to identity, visibility, and belonging.

The term bisexual doesn’t imply attraction to only men and women; rather, it acknowledges the capacity to be attracted to people of one’s own gender and other genders, including nonbinary identities. In this way, bisexuality is fluid, diverse, and inclusive by nature.

Despite being one of the most common identities under the LGBTQ+ umbrella, bisexual people are often subject to stereotypes, myths, and marginalization, which can lead to invisibility and internal conflict.

This article aims to:

• Define what it means to be bisexual in a modern, inclusive context

• Clarify common misconceptions about bisexuality

• Explore the spectrum of bisexual attraction and expression

• Highlight bisexuality’s role within the broader LGBTQ+ community

• Offer support, representation, and guidance for bisexual individuals and allies

Whether you identify as bisexual, are questioning your orientation, or are seeking to support someone in your life, this guide offers a comprehensive look at the complexity and richness of bisexual identity.

What Does Bisexual Mean?

At its core, bisexuality is the capacity for romantic and/or sexual attraction to more than one gender. This may include attraction to people of the same gender, different genders, or across the gender spectrum. A bisexual person might be attracted to men and women, or to people of all genders—but that doesn’t mean their attraction is split evenly or that it’s the same for every individual.

Contrary to outdated definitions, bisexuality is not limited to attraction to only men and women. Most modern understandings of bisexuality are intentionally inclusive of nonbinary and gender-diverse people. It is about the potential for attraction to more than one gender—not a rigid requirement of “two only.”

💡 A Common Inclusive Definition of Bisexuality:

“The potential to be attracted—romantically and/or sexually—to people of more than one gender, not necessarily at the same time, in the same way, or to the same degree.”
— Bisexual Resource Center

This broader understanding allows bisexuality to be fluid, personal, and deeply individual. No two bisexual people experience attraction in exactly the same way—and that’s what makes the identity rich and diverse.

Bisexuality vs. Pansexuality vs. Fluid Identities

It’s important to understand that bisexuality is one of several multisexual orientations, and there is often overlap or personal preference in how individuals identify.

• Bisexual: Attraction to more than one gender. This may include people of one’s own gender and others.

• Pansexual: Attraction to people regardless of gender. Often emphasizes gender-blind or all-gender-inclusive attraction.

• Sexually fluid: Describes someone whose attractions or orientation may shift over time.

These labels aren’t in competition—they’re part of a spectrum of experiences. Some people prefer “bisexual” for political or historical reasons, while others feel more aligned with “pansexual” or “fluid.” The right label is the one that feels most authentic to the individual.

Final Thought

To be bisexual is to experience the possibility of attraction beyond a single gender—and that expression can look many different ways. Whether someone uses the term to describe lifelong experiences, evolving feelings, or something in between, bisexuality is a valid and meaningful identity that deserves understanding, respect, and full inclusion.

Bisexuality vs. Pansexuality: What’s the Difference?

In conversations around sexual orientation, bisexuality and pansexuality are often grouped together—or confused altogether. While both describe attraction to more than one gender, they’re not the same, and it’s important to understand their distinctions, overlaps, and unique value.

Bisexuality: Attraction to More Than One Gender

Bisexual individuals experience romantic or sexual attraction to two or more genders. That might include:

• Attraction to their own gender and others

• Attraction to a range of gender identities—but not necessarily all

Bisexuality emphasizes the capacity for attraction beyond a single gender, while still recognizing that gender may play a role in how that attraction is experienced.

Pansexuality: Attraction Regardless of Gender

Pansexual people experience attraction regardless of someone’s gender identity. Gender is not a defining factor in their attraction. The prefix “pan-” means “all,” and pansexual individuals may describe their orientation as:

• Gender-blind

• Attraction to people as individuals, not as gendered beings

• A fluid openness to connection, regardless of how someone identifies

This doesn’t mean pansexual people are more open or evolved—it’s simply a different way of experiencing and describing attraction.

Both Identities Are Valid and Not Mutually Exclusive

Some people see bisexual and pansexual as overlapping terms. Others identify strongly with one over the other based on:

• Political history (bisexuality has been a long-standing term in LGBTQ+ activism)

• Personal experience

• Language that resonates most

It’s also possible to identify with both at different times—or neither. The most important thing is to honor how someone self-identifies, rather than enforce rigid definitions.

✅ Both bisexuality and pansexuality:

• Involve attraction to more than one gender

• Are valid, real, and respected within the LGBTQ+ community

• Face similar stereotypes, erasure, and misunderstandings

Final Thought

Understanding the difference between bisexuality and pansexuality isn’t about drawing hard lines—it’s about celebrating the diverse ways people experience attraction. Whether someone feels drawn to multiple genders or regardless of gender, both identities are part of the broader spectrum of human sexuality, and each deserves visibility, respect, and affirmation.

The Fluidity of Bisexual Attraction

One of the most powerful truths about bisexuality is that it allows space for fluidity. For bisexual individuals, attraction doesn’t always look the same across time, relationships, or experiences—and that’s not only normal, it’s part of what makes bisexuality such a rich and personal identity.

Attraction Can Shift Over Time

Being bisexual doesn’t mean a person is always equally attracted to all genders, nor does it mean their attractions remain static. Many bisexual people notice that:

• They feel more drawn to one gender at certain times in their lives

• Their preferences shift depending on context, emotional connection, or phase of self-discovery

• Their relationships don’t always “look bisexual” from the outside, especially if they’re in a monogamous relationship

This is part of sexual fluidity, a natural phenomenon where attraction is not fixed and may evolve over time. Bisexuality makes space for that change—without invalidating identity.

Bisexuality Doesn’t Require “Equal” Attraction

A common misconception is that bisexual people must be equally attracted to men and women (or all genders), but that simply isn’t true. The bisexual label doesn’t come with a quota. You don’t need a 50/50 balance—or any specific ratio—for your identity to be valid.

Some examples:

• A bisexual woman may have only dated men but still feels genuine attraction to women or nonbinary people.

• A bisexual man might feel a stronger physical pull toward men but find deeper emotional connections with women.

• A bisexual nonbinary person could be romantically interested in all genders but sexually attracted to one or two.

Each of these experiences is completely valid and fully bisexual.

How Bisexual Attraction Shows Up in Relationships

Because bisexuality includes attraction to multiple genders, it manifests differently depending on who someone is with—but the identity doesn’t change based on a current partner.

Examples:

• A bisexual person in a long-term heterosexual relationship is still bisexual.

• A bisexual person who’s only dated same-gender partners is still bisexual.

• A bisexual person in a polyamorous relationship may experience different types of connection with each partner.

Bisexuality is about potential for attraction—not proof through behavior.

Final Thought

Bisexual attraction is inherently fluid, personal, and beautifully diverse. There’s no one way to “look” or “act” bisexual, and no one person or relationship defines your orientation. Embracing this fluidity means letting go of rigid expectations and honoring bisexuality as a living, evolving part of identity.

Common Myths and Misconceptions About Bisexuality

Despite being one of the most common sexual orientations, bisexuality is also one of the most misunderstood. Harmful myths and stereotypes can lead to bisexual erasure, invalidation, and even discrimination from both heterosexual and LGBTQ+ communities.

Let’s break down a few of the most persistent misconceptions—and replace them with facts rooted in lived experience and research.

Myth 1: “Bisexual people are just confused or going through a phase.”

Fact:
Bisexuality is a valid and enduring sexual orientation.
It is not a stepping stone to being gay or straight. While some people do explore different identities over time (which is perfectly okay), many bisexual people have always known they’re attracted to more than one gender. Their identity isn’t confusion—it’s clarity.

Myth 2: “Bisexuals are equally attracted to men and women.”

Fact:
Bisexuality doesn’t require equal levels of attraction to all genders.
Many bisexual individuals are more attracted to one gender than another—or their preferences shift over time. What defines bisexuality is the capacity for attraction to more than one gender, not a perfect 50/50 split.

Myth 3: “Bisexual people are more likely to cheat or be promiscuous.”

Fact:
Sexual orientation does not determine fidelity, loyalty, or sexual behavior.
This stereotype unfairly paints bisexual individuals as inherently untrustworthy, which can lead to stigma in dating, work, and healthcare. In reality, bisexual people are no more likely to cheat than anyone else—and like everyone, they’re capable of committed, monogamous, or ethical non-monogamous relationships.

Bonus Myth: “You stop being bisexual when you’re in a relationship.”

Fact:
Your current partner’s gender doesn’t erase your identity.
A bisexual person in a same-gender or different-gender relationship is still bisexual. Attraction to multiple genders doesn’t disappear just because someone is monogamous or in a long-term relationship.

Final Thought

Bisexuality is real, stable, and valid—no matter how it looks from the outside. Breaking down these myths helps create space for bisexual people to be seen without having to prove, defend, or explain their identity. The more we challenge these misconceptions, the more inclusive and accepting our communities become.

Challenges Faced by Bisexual Individuals

Although bisexual people make up a significant portion of the LGBTQ+ community, they often face unique and painful challenges that are distinct from those experienced by gay or lesbian individuals. These challenges include not only external discrimination but also internal invisibility—something that can deeply impact mental health, relationships, and self-worth.

Biphobia from Both Straight and LGBTQ+ Communities

One of the most difficult realities for bisexual individuals is that they may experience prejudice from multiple sides:

• In heteronormative spaces, they are often told their sexuality is “just a phase,” or that they’re “confused” or “doing it for attention.”

• In some LGBTQ+ spaces, they may be viewed with suspicion or excluded, especially if they are in a different-gender relationship.

This dual marginalization—often called “double discrimination”—can leave bisexual people feeling like they don’t fully belong anywhere.

Bisexual Erasure in Media, Relationships, and Activism

Bisexual erasure is the tendency to ignore, invalidate, or rewrite bisexual identities—especially when someone appears to “fit” into a gay or straight label based on their current partner. Examples include:

• TV shows or movies that label characters as gay or straight, despite showing attraction to multiple genders

• Assumptions that someone in a heterosexual relationship “must be straight”

• LGBTQ+ advocacy that centers only gay/lesbian experiences, excluding bisexual-specific issues

This invisibility contributes to feelings of isolation, and it also means that bisexual voices and concerns are often left out of health initiatives, research, and representation.

Stereotypes and Pressure to “Choose a Side”

Bisexual people are often subjected to inaccurate and harmful stereotypes, such as:

• “They’re indecisive”

• “They’re more likely to cheat”

• “They’re just experimenting”

• “They’ll eventually pick a ‘real’ identity”

These assumptions dismiss bisexuality as a legitimate orientation and put pressure on individuals to “prove” themselves by fitting into binary categories. In reality, bisexuality exists regardless of behavior or relationship status, and no one should be asked to defend their identity.

Final Thought

Bisexual individuals face real and often invisible challenges, even within communities meant to support them. From biphobia to erasure, the pressure to explain or justify their identity is constant—and exhausting. By acknowledging these experiences, we create space for more authentic, inclusive, and affirming environments where bisexual people can live fully and unapologetically.

Coming Out as Bisexual: Tips for Self-Acceptance

Coming out as bisexual is a deeply personal journey—and no two experiences are the same. For many, acknowledging their bisexuality brings relief, clarity, and a sense of authenticity. But it can also come with uncertainty, fear of judgment, and the weight of navigating misconceptions. Wherever you are in your journey, know this: being bisexual is real, valid, and nothing to be ashamed of.

🧭 Come Out on Your Own Terms

There is no right or wrong way—or time—to come out. Your bisexual identity is yours alone, and you are not obligated to share it unless and when it feels safe and right for you.

Some questions to consider:

• Do I feel emotionally ready to talk about this?

• Is this person likely to be supportive or understanding?

• Do I have a safe place or community to turn to afterward?

Safety and comfort come first. You don’t owe anyone your story, especially if the environment may put your mental health or physical safety at risk.

💬 Navigating Reactions from Family, Friends, and Partners

People may respond to your coming out with support, confusion, or bias. Be prepared for a range of reactions—but also remember: you don’t have to educate or defend your identity unless you want to.

Tips for responding:

• With clarity: “Being bisexual means I’m attracted to more than one gender.”

• With boundaries: “I’m sharing this with you because I trust you—not to debate or prove anything.”

• With patience (for yourself): Some people may need time—but their learning process shouldn’t come at the expense of your self-worth.

In relationships, communication is key. Whether you’re dating someone of the same or a different gender, being bisexual doesn’t change based on your partner. Reassure them of your love while holding space for your truth.

🏳️‍🌈 Finding Support in LGBTQ+ Spaces

Unfortunately, bisexual people can sometimes feel invisible even within LGBTQ+ communities. But there are growing spaces that celebrate and uplift bisexual voices.

Look for:

• Bisexual-specific online groups and social media spaces (e.g., #BiVisibility, @biresource)

• Supportive subreddits and Discord servers

• LGBTQ+ centers that offer bi+ inclusive events or meetups

• Mental health professionals who are affirming and understand bisexual identity

Community makes a difference. Being around others who “get it” can boost confidence, fight erasure, and help you celebrate who you are.

Final Thought

Coming out as bisexual is not just about telling others—it’s about telling yourself: I am real, I am valid, and I am enough. Whether you whisper it to your reflection or share it publicly, this act of self-recognition is courageous. Do it your way, in your time, and with people who uplift your journey.

Dating as a Bisexual Person

Dating as a bisexual person can be joyful, affirming, and deeply meaningful—but it can also come with unique challenges due to widespread misconceptions and stereotypes. Whether dating someone of the same gender, a different gender, or another bisexual person, communication and mutual respect are key to building healthy, secure relationships.

🚫 Bisexuality Doesn’t Mean “Open” or Polyamorous by Default

One of the most common myths is that being bisexual means a person must desire or need multiple partners to be fulfilled. This is false.

• Many bisexual people prefer monogamous relationships.

• Others may explore ethical non-monogamy, but it has nothing to do with being bisexual—it’s simply a personal relationship choice.

• Being attracted to multiple genders doesn’t mean someone can’t commit to one partner—it just means their orientation isn’t limited to a single gender.

Like anyone else, bisexual individuals vary in their desires, boundaries, and relationship styles.

💞 Navigating Relationships with Different-Gender Partners

When dating people of different orientations or gender identities, bisexual people may encounter a range of experiences:

• With straight partners: There may be misunderstandings, insecurity, or even erasure—especially if the partner assumes bisexuality “disappears” in a hetero-presenting relationship.

• With gay or lesbian partners: Some may question a bisexual person’s “queerness,” leading to feelings of exclusion or doubt.

• With other bisexuals: There can be shared understanding—but it’s still important to clarify needs and expectations like in any relationship.

In all scenarios, open communication helps dispel myths, affirm identity, and create mutual trust.

🛑 Dealing with Stereotypes and Partner Concerns

Bisexual individuals are often unfairly subjected to harmful assumptions like:

• “They’re more likely to cheat.”

• “They’ll leave me for someone of another gender.”

• “They’re just indecisive or experimenting.”

These fears are rooted in biphobia and misinformation—not reality. Reassure partners that:

• Attraction ≠ action: Being capable of attraction to multiple genders doesn’t mean someone is any more likely to stray.

• Identity isn’t a threat: Being bisexual is a part of who they are—not a reflection of dissatisfaction in the relationship.

• Trust is earned: As in any relationship, fidelity, communication, and honesty build security—not assumptions about orientation.

For bisexual people, it’s important to hold firm in your identity without feeling pressure to downplay it to make others comfortable.

Final Thought

Bisexual people can form loving, loyal, and deeply fulfilling relationships—just like anyone else. Whether dating straight, gay, or other queer partners, the key to success lies in openness, mutual respect, and challenging harmful stereotypes together. Your identity is not a complication—it’s simply part of who you are.

How to Be an Ally to Bisexual Individuals

Being a true ally to bisexual individuals means more than just acceptance—it involves actively supporting, affirming, and amplifying bisexual voices in both personal and public spaces. Because bisexual people often face erasure and stigma from both heterosexual and LGBTQ+ communities, allyship is essential in creating a world where their identities are seen, respected, and celebrated.

✅ 1. Avoid Harmful Stereotypes and Respect Bisexual Identities

Biphobic myths and assumptions can be incredibly damaging. As an ally, commit to challenging ideas like:

• “Bisexual people are confused, indecisive, or going through a phase.”

• “They’re more likely to cheat, can’t commit, or always want multiple partners.”

• “They stop being bisexual when they date someone of a particular gender.”

The reality is simple: bisexuality is real, stable, and doesn’t disappear based on current relationships. Respect how someone self-identifies, and don’t question their orientation based on your assumptions.

💬 2. Use Inclusive Language

Words matter. You can affirm bisexual people in everyday conversation by being thoughtful about how you speak. That includes:

• Saying “partner” or “significant other” instead of assuming someone’s partner’s gender

• Avoiding jokes that stereotype bisexuality as promiscuous or indecisive

• Acknowledging bisexuality specifically, rather than lumping everyone into “gay” or “straight” categories

Also, when someone comes out to you as bisexual, listen without questioning or minimizing their experience. Validation is one of the most powerful acts of allyship.

📣 3. Support Bisexual Visibility in Activism and Media

Bisexual individuals are often underrepresented—even in LGBTQ+ media and advocacy. Help change that by:

• Following and amplifying bisexual activists, creators, and educators

• Supporting bi+ inclusive campaigns and organizations, like the Bisexual Resource Center, BiNet USA, or #BiVisibility Day initiatives

• Encouraging LGBTQ+ organizations to include bisexual-specific issues in programming and policy

• Recognizing that bisexual people exist in every community, race, gender, and age group—and deserve to be centered, not sidelined

Bisexual erasure is a form of invisibility that can lead to poorer mental health outcomes, fewer resources, and less representation. Visibility isn’t just empowering—it’s life-affirming.

Final Thought

Being an ally to bisexual individuals means standing up, speaking out, and making space. It means challenging harmful ideas, celebrating identity, and recognizing the full humanity of people who love across the gender spectrum. When bisexual people are seen and supported, the entire LGBTQ+ community becomes stronger, more inclusive, and more just.

Bisexual Representation in Media and History

Representation matters—especially for identities that are often erased or mischaracterized. Bisexual people have always existed, shaped culture, and led change, yet their presence is frequently overlooked in both historical narratives and modern media. Reclaiming and celebrating bisexual representation helps affirm the reality and diversity of bisexual experiences across generations.

🌍 Bisexuality Throughout History and Cultures

While the term bisexual is relatively modern, the experience of being attracted to more than one gender is ancient and global. Across time and cultures, bisexuality has been present—even if described differently.

Examples include:

• Ancient Greece and Rome, where same-gender and different-gender relationships were normalized among men of certain social classes.

• Many Indigenous cultures, such as those with Two-Spirit traditions, recognized sexual and gender diversity long before colonial influence.

• Historical figures like Leonardo da Vinci, Emily Dickinson, James Baldwin, and Virginia Woolf are often cited as having expressed bisexual or fluid attractions—though modern labels may not have existed at the time.

Recognizing these histories reaffirms that bisexuality is not new, fringe, or experimental—it’s part of humanity’s broad and beautiful sexual spectrum.

🎬 Famous Bisexual Figures in Entertainment, Politics, and Activism

Many public figures have proudly identified as bisexual and used their visibility to challenge stigma and inspire others. Some notable names include:

• Freddie Mercury – Iconic Queen frontman who defied genre, gender, and expectations.

• Lady Gaga – Musician and outspoken advocate for the LGBTQ+ community who has identified as bisexual.

• Megan Fox, Halsey, and Tessa Thompson – Celebrities who have openly discussed their attraction to multiple genders.

• Brenda Howard – Known as the “Mother of Pride,” she was a bisexual activist who helped organize the first Pride march in 1970.

• Sara Ramirez – Actor and activist who identifies as bisexual and nonbinary, breaking new ground for representation in shows like Grey’s Anatomy and And Just Like That.

These individuals prove that bisexuality exists everywhere—in every industry, identity, and generation.

📚 The Power of Positive Media Representation

Too often, bisexual characters in media are:

• Oversexualized

• Portrayed as unfaithful, unstable, or confused

• Defined by their partner’s gender and not their own identity

But that’s changing. As creators, writers, and performers claim their bisexuality and demand more authentic portrayals, we’re seeing richer, more accurate stories emerge.

Notable examples of bisexual representation in film and TV:

• Rosa Diaz (Brooklyn Nine-Nine) – A rare example of a bisexual Latina character portrayed with depth and dignity.

• David Rose (Schitt’s Creek) – Openly pansexual, but often embraced by the bi+ community for normalizing fluid attraction.

• Callie Torres (Grey’s Anatomy) – One of the longest-running bisexual characters on television.

Representation like this helps:

• Combat stereotypes

• Normalize bisexuality in everyday life

• Show young people that their identity is real, valid, and seen

Final Thought

Bisexual representation—past and present—is essential. It helps rewrite the narrative that bisexuality is temporary, shameful, or invisible. From history books to Hollywood, from political activism to personal storytelling, bisexual people have always been here. It’s time the world sees them fully.

Resources for Bisexual Individuals and Allies

Whether you’re exploring your identity, coming out, or supporting someone who identifies as bisexual, having access to the right resources can make a world of difference. From education to community to mental health support, these tools help affirm bisexual people and foster deeper understanding among allies.

🏳️‍🌈 Organizations and Online Communities

Several LGBTQ+ groups and bi-specific organizations offer valuable support, advocacy, and visibility for bisexual individuals:

• Bisexual Resource Center (BRC) – The oldest national bi+ organization, offering support, education, and resources specifically for bisexual people.

• BiNet USA – A grassroots organization advocating for bi+ inclusion and policy change.

• GLAAD – Offers resources and media guidance that promote inclusive and accurate bisexual representation.

• TrevorSpace – A moderated, international online community for LGBTQ+ youth, including bisexual individuals.

• Reddit: Communities like r/bisexual and r/lgbt provide safe spaces to share stories and ask questions.

• Discord Servers and Facebook Groups – Many identity-based communities offer support groups tailored to bi+ individuals and allies.

📚 Books, Movies, and Articles About Bisexuality

Representation and education through media help combat stigma and promote understanding. Here are some recommended reads and watchlist additions:

Books:

• Bi: Notes for a Bisexual Revolution by Shiri Eisner – A bold, intersectional take on bisexuality and activism.

• Greedy: Notes from a Bisexual Who Wants Too Much by Jen Winston – A personal and humorous memoir exploring bisexuality, shame, and self-discovery.

• The Bisexual’s Guide to the Universe by Nicole Kristal & Mike Szymanski – A lighthearted, accessible intro to bi+ identity.

Movies/TV:

• The Bisexual (Hulu) – A witty and thought-provoking series about fluidity and self-exploration.

• Call Me by Your Name and Moonlight – While not explicitly labeled as bisexual, these films depict complex, fluid attraction.

• Schitt’s Creek and Grey’s Anatomy – Popular shows with strong bi+ characters.

Articles & Blogs:

• Autostraddle’s bisexual archives

• Medium blogs by bi+ activists

• Bisexuality coverage on platforms like Them, INTO, and Everyday Feminism

🧠 Mental Health Resources

Due to persistent erasure, stigma, and “double discrimination” from both straight and gay communities, bisexual individuals are at higher risk for anxiety, depression, and identity-related stress. Access to affirming mental health care is essential.

Recommended resources:

• LGBTQ+-affirming therapists (check directories like Psychology Today or TherapyDen)

• LGBTQ+ community centers offering support groups for bi+ individuals

• The Trevor Project – Crisis support for LGBTQ+ youth

• Trans Lifeline and LGBT National Help Center – Also inclusive of bisexual support needs

• Planned Parenthood – Often provides inclusive counseling and referrals

Remember: mental health struggles don’t make your identity any less valid. Getting support is a sign of strength—not weakness.

Final Thought

Whether you’re bisexual yourself or supporting someone who is, these resources provide connection, clarity, and care. Community is vital. Education is powerful. And visibility saves lives. You are not alone—and you are more than enough.

Conclusion

Bisexuality is a vibrant, valid, and often misunderstood identity that reflects the capacity to love and desire beyond a single gender. Whether someone experiences attraction to men and women, or to multiple genders in fluid or shifting ways, being bisexual is not a phase, confusion, or halfway point—it’s a complete and authentic orientation.

Throughout history and into the present day, bisexual people have existed, thrived, and contributed to every area of society. And yet, they often face erasure, biphobia, and pressure to justify their identity. That’s why visibility, education, and compassionate allyship matter so deeply.

Understanding bisexuality means embracing complexity, celebrating fluidity, and rejecting the idea that attraction must be binary or easily categorized. Whether you’re bisexual yourself, questioning, or supporting someone in your life, remember: identity is personal, attraction is diverse, and love has no limits.